Self Control, Got Some?

Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control. Proverbs 25:28

This morning as I was completing day 5 of this weeks bible study homework, conviction fell all over me. I could so relate to the story that the author was sharing of how she felt conviction when studying 'self control'. I sit morning after morning, sipping my coffee with flavored creamers, sometimes eating along with it as I do my study. This morning, as I read about her drinking her coffee, eating dark chocolate and jelly beans, I was drinking coffee and eating strawberry pop tarts. I realized, just as she did how ridiculous this is.

I have spent the last 4 and half years of my life trying to get away from unhealthy eating. I took great measures by the grace of God, to become healthier and happier in my own loose skin and yet I sit here doing what got me in that predicament to begin with. I guess what upsets me about it most is that I am not honoring the temple of God. My body is a temple. He resides in me and I have not been taking care of it. I have let my 'wall' begin to crumble and by doing so I am allowing a foothold for the enemy. A place of weakness for Satan to step through and use to defeat me.

I can remember with great dread and shame how he used my desire for food and my use of it to medicate my feelings to disarm me before. I also know that in the years since, as I gained strength and control over that addiction through the strength of Christ I was able to hold the enemy at bay, at least in that area, and move forward in my relationship with God. I do not want to go back to the way things were.

This morning, as I sit here, I am praying for God's strength to take over in this area. I have stopped at one pop tart, instead of two. As I face this day, and those that follow, I will try to make better choices. I will continue to walk this journey and it will be a battle for me forever because it is an area of weakness in my armor, my wall. But I know, that because I have the ONE who has defeated him on my side, I will win.

Dear Lord I confess my lack of self-control. I ask for your strength, by your Holy Spirit in this area and in any other that I have weaknesses in. I am human, I know they are there, but I know that through you I can make better choices that will allow me to serve you better.

May we all, by the power of the Holy Spirit, ask for God to work in and through us today.